What God want vs what i want

I am still discovering as well. What God wants... pondering...Definitely God wants us to be people who have character . I hope to be one too. Recently this thing hit me real hard especially after attending the monday jamming. God is looking for both, spirit and skill. is not mutually exclusive.
I love the lord, therefore i want to improve my skill, not i want to play for service therefore i want to love the lord.
this become very real in me.
After the jamming, i went back home walking in the rain. Have anyoneof you trying to walk in the rain for 1/2 half purposely? I DID.. I walk in the rain for 1/2 hr , letting the raindrops fall on me as i worshipping the lord , with the rain drop hitting on my face, mixing together with the tears falling from my eyes. I have such burden.... something that i find hard to use any word to describe.
Once again, i sense God is with me. Just me and God, silently. no conversation, but just know that He is with me walking with me. He is aware of all my emotions, my feelings my thoughts. Like in Psalm 33 "

"he who at his dwelling place
watches all who is on earth"

he form the heart of all, and consider everything we do. He once again captivated my heart with his love.
How sweet the sound, the sound that you can only hear it when you trully put your heart in Him.
I love it, i yearn for it and i am addicted to it.

I just want to obey the lord as much as i can. For his grace have been so evident in my life.

God says in psalms"

"cast all you cares on him

he will will sustain you

he will not let the righteous falls."

This verse just give me such assurance, when i start to cast all my cares on him. he will take care.

Maybe some people will think that i am emotional, but I use it for the best. To enjoy Him in my life. Nothing wrong with being emotional, but is how and who you use it on? I choose to use it on HIM.


Btw... my sheep ask me what my criteria for my spouse in future.... it just make me laugh... cause i still remember Leanne told me hers that time and when i heard it.. i am like " MAn.... ONLY JESUS FITS IT lo"
hahah... its really funny...
Jasmine been asking me about this as well. I am not really Kam jeong over it yet .. there are still many things that i find more important than this area of my life.
But nevertheless, i started to think .. what i want... cause i dun want to end up with any Tom dick or harry... waa...... -.-''

Then i start to think through... and come up with this top 3 criteria

1) Passion , Burden and have vision in praise and worship
2) God Fearing
3) Faithful

I think this is what i have come to after thinking through.

Anyway, I am still so young... now all in me is to see my vision step by step coming to pass as i walk in obedience in God.


God is with me.